Robert crawled out of my bed at 5:00 a.m. to go to work. I woke up at 11 a.m., and I had an hour to kill before he would be back at my apartment. I moved my Judaism books on to the floor to make room for the CD player he brought from his house. I cashed my unemployment check and buy CDs because he hadn't listened to a new group since Simon and Garfunkel.
When he got back to my apartment, I was dancing in the mirror to Sonic Youth. I went over to kiss him but he said I should keep dancing. He wanted to watch. I said he should dance with me, but he said he didn't know how to dance.
"You just do what you want," I said.
"I can't," he said.
I danced until the end of the next song. I was sweaty and breathing hard, and I pulled him onto my bed. "I love having you here," I said, and I kissed him and rolled onto him and wrinkled his shirt, because now it didn't matter.
Robert went to the end of the bed and pulled at the legs of my pants. I lifted my hips, and as the pants slipped Robert watched my slowly appearing pink.
He took off his pants. I rubbed my cheek against the soft blond curls on his leg while he fished his market computer out of his pants. He tossed it by the pillow. He was short yen, and he had to watch the market.
I moved my cheek up his thigh to his balls, and I licked around them and under them because this was what the last boyfriend told me to do during one of my moments of incompetence.
Robert moaned and said, "I love this." I put his balls in my mouth and he yelled out and dropped to his knees. I wanted to do that forever because I felt like somehow, I got good at it.
He pushed me back on the bed and slipped my panties off. He put them to his face, and I hoped they were clean. He licked them and I laughed. He put his head in between my thighs and said, "Can I kiss you?"
I had been thinking that this was something for after he got a lawyer, but he was so close, and I was so curious. "Okay," I said. I spread my thighs a little more, to make room for him, but I didn't spread too wide because I wanted him to think we're doing this for him, not me.
His tongue felt soft and warm. I picked up my head to see what he looked like, and he looked like he was getting really messy. The more he licked around my vagina, the more I wanted him in there. I heard myself being loud, and the louder I was, the tighter he wrapped his arms around my thighs. When my hips were tipped up and my head was tipped back, I was not even thinking of him when he said, "I want to go inside you."
I was silent while he adjusted his body so his penis was waiting right outside, waiting for an okay. I was silent while his hips rocked his penis back and forth, back and forth, until I said, "Yes."
Afterward, when we were lying together, Robert wanted to check where the yen was, but we couldn't find the computer.
When we sat up, there was a red welt where it dug into my back.
"I can't believe you didn't notice it was hurting you," he said, as he checked the Tokyo exchange.